Just a Dream
by purpleprincessparty
Summary: When you are tired of all the fights. You just want to wish it away. But what will happen if you continue the fights and pull the last straw? Will it all be just a dream or your worst nightmare come to life? Not Slash. First Outsiders fic. Enjoy!
1. Last Straw

**Ok, here's my first attempt at a fic for the Outsiders. I'm not new here, but to this section of I am. So be nice or rude, don't care. Just please if you read this leave a comment. **

**I don't own the Outsiders only this plot and if any oc's appear. Read on...**

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We all knew Darry had no intentions of fighting with Ponyboy, but the kid just had to get into Darry's last nerve. Soda knew he could've done something to shut his kid brother up, but he was frozen in his spot, just watching the argument with wide eyes. Both Pony and Darry were throwing words at eachother like daggers with intentions to kill their opponents. Pony, being the smart kid, drew the last straw that tore the family apart.

"You're the worst brother I could have. I. Hate. You. I prefer to be thrown in jail or go to a boys home, but I don't want to be here another minute." Ponyboy said, with a lot of coldness, pain and hatred put in it.

"Fine, leave. But you'll end up coming back later and I won't be here to open that stupid door and welcome you back with open arms like I used to. You wanna leave, do it. But don't you dare come back Ponyboy Curtis." Darry threw the same coldness and pain towards Pony.

"I always knew you didn't like me. You prefered Sodapop over me all the time. I can't believe I ever trusted you. I should've died in that fire at the church or at the rumble with Dally." Pony shook his head and walked towards his and Soda's room to pack his things.

Soda finally got his brain working and ran towards the direction Pony went.

"Pone, you can't leave. At least not like this. Kid, think it through. Darry's been having hard times at his job and he's tired and frustrated honey. Give him another chance, you can't just go like this. Let me talk to him first and if you still want to leave, then I won't stop you. Just give me that chance to talk to him, please." Soda begged, his tears falling down his cheeks.

Ponyboy let out a sigh and nodded. Soda left the room and to talk to Darry.

"Darry? Darry, where are you?" Sodapop asked searching the house. He walked towards Darry room, but the door was closed. Soda had a bad feeling about something. Soda knocked on the door once, twice, three times and no answer. So Soda just opened the door and let it swing up. He gasped and his tears fell faster. There was his older brother, sprawled on the floor. Chest rising very slowly. Sodapop ran towards his brother and knelt down next to him, trying to wake him up, praying that he was alright.

"Darr, please wake up. Poyboy!" Soda yelled at his kid brother.

"What, did he- oh my gosh, what happened?" Pony asked walking closer to them.

"I don't know, just call an ambulance, quick!" Soda was close to killing Ponyboy for not moving right away, but eventually the kid moved and ran to call for help.

Soon the the ambulance arrived and took Darry. Soda drove them to the hospital in the old truck. Pony was so shocked and scared for Darry.

At the hospital, Soda was pacing back and forth while Ponyboy was sitting on a chair, with his head in his hands. They heard footsteps and walked towards the doctor.

"Doctor, how is he?" Soda asked really worried at seeing the doctor's sad expression.

"He had a heart attack. He barely made it, but we stabalized him, for now." The doctor explained.

"What caused the heart attack?"  
"Stress. An argument caused his heart beat to accelerate to much. Eventually his breathing couldn't catch up and caused the heart attack."

Pony couldn't believe his luck. _He_ had caused Darry's heart attack. It was _his _fault Darry was there. If he hadn't started the fight, none of this would've happened. None of it. But it's too late now. What was done was done.

"Doctor, we need help! We're losing the patient!" A nurse yelled with a frantic look.

"Sorry guys. I'll tell you when we I come back." The doctor ran towards the nurse and they ran into a room closing the door.

Pony feel on his knees and started sobbing. His life was falling apart slowly again. Soda sat next to Pony and hugged him will he too cried.

"I-It's my f-fault he's h-here. I-It's a-always my f-fault."

A few minutes later the doctor walked out, with an even sadder look in his face. Both boys got up and meet the doctor half way.

"I'm sorry. We did all we could, but he passed away." The doctor looked apolegetically at them and walked out. Ponyboy started sobbing even harder. The burden he has to carry untill the day he dies. He provoked Darry's death. Not caring the consequences. Not caring if he'd hurt him badly this time. Or if Darry would hit him. All Soda could do was comfort his kid brother and cry. They'd be sent to a boys home. They'd have to be away from their friends. And nothing would never be the same again.

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**Ok here's chapter one and my first attempt at this. Just an FYI I'm kinda bad at posting fast. All of my other readers know that and I have/do apologize. But for this story, I'm gonna post asap depending on the reviews I get. Reviews are welcomed with open arms.**


	2. Losing Sanity

**Thanks to those of you who reviewed. It means the world to me. I just decided, it won't be a long story. Maybe 3-6 chapters. Here's chapter two. Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Outsiders, S.E Hinton does.**

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Pony woke up the next morning. Not remembering much about last night, but still knew that Darry was gone. Pony looked around and saw that Soda was nowhere to be seen. He started getting scared, but then Soda walked in, smiling a little. Ponyboy tried smiling back, but his smiled turned upside down when he started having flashbacks of the night before.

_It's your fault your brother's dead._ That little voice inside of Pony's head said.

_Shut up. _Pony growled in his head.

_Why should I? It's the truth. You're guilty. Guilty. GUILTY! _The voice got louder and louder untill Pony had enough and screamed out loud for it to shut up. Soda just starred at Ponyboy. Scared and confusion written across his face.

"Ponyboy, what's wrong?" Soda asked worried for the sanity of his little brother.

"I can't take this! It's my fault he died! They're right. I'm guilty. If I were you I'd kill me. Heck I don't even want to be alive!" Ponyboy began sobbing again.

Soda's heart shatterd into a trillion pieces just seeing his kid brother brake down like that. He didn't deserve to feel guilty. He didn't do anything wrong. I guess it was God's will to take Darry away from their lives for good.

"Honey, listen. It wasn't your fault. It was nobody's fault. You're just blaming yourself and it's not true. You're not guilty, Pone. Please stop saying you are. Do it for Darry's memory. He, along with mom and dad, will always be in our hearts. It's part of the life cycle. We hatch, er I mean we're born, we grow up, grow old and die. For others it's different. Some never grow old. Like half our family. Just remember that you'll never be the culprit of Darry's death. Ok kid?" Soda said, wrapping his arms around his shaking brother.

"O-Ok."

_*Soda's POV*_

Ponyboy fell back asleep after our little talk. I was glad that he was getting some sleep, even if he was under a medication right now, but he doesn't know. Life without Darry is going to be really different.

"Hey, we heard what happened to Superman. How you guys holdin' up?" Two-Bit asked, walking into the house with Steve.

"We'll I'm doing better than Pony. He feels guilty. Doctor gave me some medication for him for when he had his panic attacks or something similar."  
"We'll where is the kid now?" Steve asked looking around the living room.

"He's asleep right now. I'm not sure if he'll be in conditions for the funeral. But knowing the kid I know he wouldn't want to miss it."

Two-Bit let out a sigh and I just went back to my thinking.

_*Pony's POV*_

I woke up past five in the afternoon. My head felt like lead and every move I did caused me to get dizzy. There was talking coming from the living room and I knew that the two remainig members of the gang were here. Oh boy.

I tried getting up, but fell back down on the bed. I remembered the doctor giving Sodapop something the night before. Said something about my breakdowns. Guess they gave me pills. Hmm... I wonder.

_You just want to kill yourself 'cause that's your only exit. _The voice started taunting me.

_'Shut up. you just want to drive me to a phsyciatrist and lock me in there so you can keep taunting me.' _I growled back at myself which to others would seem stupid and think that I lost every bit of my sanity.

I tried getting up again and this time I got all the way to the door and flung it open. All talking and bickering stopped and I felt someone's hand wrap around my shoulders. It was Soda. He lead me towards the living room and sat me on the couch next to Two-Bit.

"How ya feelin' kid?" He whispered, probably thinking I had a headache, which I do.

"How every person should feel when they're the ones accused of murder." I spoke harshly.

Next thing I knew Soda gripped my shoulders tight and nearly screamed directly in my ear, "Get a hold of yourself Ponyboy. It wasn't your fault. We've been throught this kid! Don't do this Pone. Please, just-" Then Soda ran out the room.

Now I started feeling even guiltier.

"Look at what you did kid!" Steve yelled right in my face and slapped me.

"Go fucking after him! Don't you dare slap me again you bastard!" I pulled the last straw of my sanity on Steve and went back to my room slamming the door shut.

_If anything happens to your brother, it's on you idiot._

_'I. Don't. Care. Now just leave me alone!' _I shouted.

I got frustated and started throwing things across the room. A mirror that was hanging on the wall fell and broke into a thousand tiny pieces. I knelt down next to it, picked up a piece of glass and brought it to my wrist. Should I?

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**Here's chapter 2! Hope ya'll liked it! Reviews, ya dig?**


	3. Funeral

**Here's chapter three. Enjoy!**

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_I picked up a piece of glass and brought it to my wrist. Should I?_

_*Soda's POV*_

I just couldn't see my baby brother accuse himself like that. He's destroying his life.

I ran out the room and just sat down on the front steps of the house, with my head in my hands. I jumped when someone placed their hand on my shoulder. I was expecting it to be Pony, but it was Two-Bit and Steve.

"Hey, you ok? Ya ran off back there." Steve said with concern in his voice.

"Yeah, just needed some fresh air." I lied.

"We'll Stevie here smacked your kid brother right on the cheek. Probably gonna leave a bruise. Don't worry though, Pony's tough he yelled back at Steve." Two- Bit said, earning a glare from Steve. Two-Bit just held his hands up defensively.

"Steve, don't ya ever hit him again, ya got it? He's my responsibility now, not yours. And whatever Pone said, I'm glad he defended himself. Thanks Two-Bit for telling me."

"You're welcome Soda."

I walked back into the house and Pony wasn't in the leaving room. I heard glass shatter from our room and I ran opening the door. There was Ponyboy, kneeling next to a broken mirror and a piece of glass on his right hand making a light trail of blood on his left wrist.

"PONYBOY MICHEAL CURTIS! What the hell do you think you're doin'? Do you want to kill yourself? Huh? Is that your way out?" I sat infront of him and started screaming right infront of his face, again.

Pony just flinched and released a few tears. He dropped the glass and shook his head, trying hard to choke back a sob. I sighed in relief and he lunged himself at me, squeazing the daylights out of me. But I was glad I stopped him before he did something stupid. We sat there hugging eachother for a while until his tears stopped falling.

"You ok now?" I asked pulling back from the hug.

Pony nodded and looked down at his wrist.

"Wait here baby. I'm gonna get the first-aid kit." I got up and walked towards the bathroom.

I walked back and started cleaning his cut, earning hisses from Pony. Finally I wrapped it with a cloth.

"Thanks Sodapop." Pony whispered.

"You're welcome kid." I smiled and ruffled his hair.

"Goly, there go seven years of bad luck for ya." Two-Bit said whisteling.

Pony rolled his eyes and chukled softly.

_*Pony's POV (Funeral Day)*_

Soda was getting ready and was sitting on the porch swing, just starring at the empty road. Two-Bit and Steve walked toward the house sitting on either side of me on the swing.

"Ya sure ya wanna go kid?" Steve whispered, ever since our little fight the other day, we've been what you can say friends.

"Ya I'm fine. Besides if I don't go, I'll feel guilty." I answered back, not moving my gaze from the road.

-At Funeral Home-

I had an urge to walk up to the open cascket and look down at the pale body. I feelt sick to my stomach just starrin' at him. White as a sheet of paper. Not moving. Still as a statue.

I have no idea how long I starred at him, but all of a sudden his eyes opened. I gasped and staggered backwards. His eyes closed fast. Was I really going crazy? No this can't be happening. Darry's dead. He died at the hospital.

My mind started spining. I heard a few shouts, but they sounded so distant. My world turned black and last thing I felt was the cold hard ground.

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**How creepy for Darry to wake up like that? I had a crazy thought and that's what I came up with. So did ya like? one or two chapters left. BYE!**


	4. Cry for Help

**You guys are so amazing. Thanks to all the reviews and I have decided to make the story a few chapters longer! Yeah! Thanks again. My first fic on this section and I get all those wonderful reviews. You guys are the best! I love ya'll.**

**Disclaimer: I donot own the Outsiders. **

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"Ponyboy, wake up!" Someone shook my arm.

"Darry!" I woke up screaming Darry's name. I looked around me and saw Soda, Steve and Two-Bit starring at me. Soda looked really worried and his eyes were red and dry tear stains ran down his cheeks. We were still at the funeral home. I was laying across some chairs and the others were kneeling infront of me. I sat up but layed back down as I started to feel dizzy.

"Easy bud. You took a big fall there. Why'd you faint? Are ya sick or somethin'?" Soda asked his voice cracking a bit.

"Uh, I'm not sure. I-I thought I saw Darry open his eyes and I got scared." I admited. I didn't want to tell him cause he probably thinks I lost my screw the day Darry died. But then if I don't tell him, that's going to haunt me till the day I die.

Two-Bit and Steve snickered, but Sodapop shot them a glare and they left, probably to laugh at me without Soda hearing them.

"Pone, you must be stressed out. Why don't we go home? We're done here anyways. Come on. Let the others walk home, I don't feel like driving them." Soda helped me up and wrapped an arm around my shoulders and we walked silently to the parking lot.

"Did you really imagine Darry wake up?" Soda asked out of nowhere.

"Huh? Oh, I thought I saw him. I know he's dead, but when he woke up it looked so real. Like if he wasn't really dead. And don't ask me if I think he's dead cause I know he's dead. And don't think I'm losing my screws cause I'm not that stupid."

"I wasn't going to say anything."

~ Two Days Later ~

_**"Ponyboy, I need you to visit me. Help me Pony! My time is running out!"**_

I woke up gasping. It was Darry. Why was he asking for my help? Is he not in peace? What does he want from-!

"Pony, you ok?" Soda asked walking in the room.

"Uh, yeah, why'd you ask?" I said a little worried.

"Well you were talkin' to yourself."

Oh great.

~Later~

Two-Bit and Steve were watching tv while Sodapop made, or at least tried, to make dinner. I came out of my room and sat on Darry's chair. I curled myself into a ball and fell asleep.

_**"Ponyboy hurry up! I need you to come and dig me out! I can't breath! PONY!"  
**_I woke up and the gang was looking at me.

"What?" I asked slightly annoyed.

"Nothin'. Someone's crabby." Steve tried mumbling the last part, but I still heard him.

"Shut your trap Randel." I warned.

"Ponyboy, be nice." Two-Bit warned me.

Um, shouldn't Soda be the one telling me to behave?

"I'm goin' for a walk." I announced.

"Don't be late kid!" Soda yelled after me.

I walked as far as my legs would carry me. Somehow I ended up at the cementery. My legs walked me all the way to Darry's grave.

_**"HELP ME!"**_

The voice got louder here. I looked down and was tempted to undig Darry. But am I really that crazy?

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Sorry for any grammar mistakes. I'll try fixin' it tomorrow.

**Ok, reviews make me happy and sorry if I took a little longer then usual. I wanted to make it fit now that I extended the story. ;D**


	5. He's Back The End

**I'm so sorry guys, but I kind of got stuck on this chapt and it took me awhile to get unstuck, but here it is! And I was going to post this Sunday but we had that tornado and it knocked our internet connection nd just last night we got it back up. So last chapt! Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: i don't and never will own the Outsiders.**

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I got down on my knees infront of his grave. My hands shakingly reached out infront of me and touched the dirt.

_Am I really going to do this? _I thought.

As I was about to start digging, when I felt a pair of arms wrap behind me. For some reason I was soaking wet and now that I realized it, it was raining pretty hard. I turned around and saw Sodapop hugging me. His eyes were slightly red, but other then that he looked better then me.

"Pone, let's go home. You're gonna get sick." Soda begged, but my little voice in my head said I had to stay and do this or otherwise it'd be too late, but for what?

"S-Soda, can I stay a little longer? I want to talk to Darry for a bit." I said, trying to sound innocent.

"But honey you can get sick if we don't leave."

"Please. I'll be home before it gets uglier or darker."  
"Fine."

Soda got up and left. I turned my attention to the muddy soil. I must be nuts to do this, but heck, I am. I took in a deep breath and started digging with a pail that was left there from the funeral.

_Hurry Pone! I only have a few minutes!_

I digged as fast as I could and in no time, I had reached Darry's casket. I got down next to it and unlocked it. What if all that's left are bones and ash? Is it even Darry's grave? I quickly checked and sighed in reliefe finding it was.

_PONYBOY COME ON!_

Here goes nothin'. I opened it and found Darry with his eyes wide open and his breathing becoming shallow. I tried backing away, but impossible due to the small space. This has to be a nightmare. He's dead not alive!

"D-Darry?" I studdered out, my hand reaching over to touch him. I pulled my hand back instantly, not wanting to touch him, just incase he wasn't really real. But then again he was. My brother was back. Wait, he never died.

"DARRY!" I yelled and hugged him really tight once he was in a sitting position.

"Hey baby." He said, his voice a little raspy but he hugged me back tight.

"I m-missed you. It was m-my f-fault you d-died!" I sobbed into his chest.

"Shh baby, it wasn't your fault. Calm down please. Even if I was dead, which I'm happy I'm not, I would still forgive ya, cause you're my brother and it wasn't your fault."

"T-Thanks Dar, can we go home? Sodapop must be worried by now." I sniffled and sneezed. Stupid rain.

We walked home, in the rain and stopping a lot beacause some greasers couldn't believe Darry was alive. They thought he was some sort of zombie or that I had done witchcraft.

We walked up to the porch and I opened the door slowly, only to be tackled by Sodapop.

"Pone I was worried! Are you ok?" HE threw in a bunch of questions in which half I spaced out.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Soda it's Darry." I began and he got a confused look.

"What about him?"

"I'm right here buddy. I never died." Darry said walking out from behind me.

Soda turned pale and looked like he was about to faint, but I walked him to the couch and made him sit down.

"That c-can't be possible." He studdered out.

"I never died. It was all a false alarm." Darry kneeled infront of him and hugged him tight. Soda hugged back and started to bawl his eyes out. I smiled, a few tears forming in my eyes.

"I cant b-believe you're alive Dar. Pone, how did you know?"

"Well ever since Darry 'died' I started hearing a voice in my head. It sounded a lot like Darry's and the voice always told me to look for him in the cemententary and dig him out. At first I was really freaked out by the idea, but then I got up my courage and did as the voice told me to and I found Darry."

"I'm glad he did, or otherwise I wouldn't be here. For sure."

I just smiled and got up to go take a shower since i got mud in my hair and stuff like that.

As the time went by everything went back to normal. It was as if Darry had never left us. Which now I can say my conciouss is clean and I don't feel guilty for supposedly killing my own brother casue as much as he annoys me, I would never do that.

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**Crappy ending, I know but I wanted to finish this story so I can start planning a new one. So there you go. I shall see you guys next time! **

**No time for editing so any errors i'll fix sometime.**


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